In the recent year I have felt so deprived of almost all the comforts I used to have since I left home and moved in with my Mum in her family's compound. My quality time with my dad and my brother, having my friends come over to my home, my boyfriend making me feel like a princess, and alot more. I am in a situation where I cannot watch the television as often as I used to. I missed all the episodes of the telenobelas that I have been watching last year and now those programs are over. Although my decision to come over was very important to my own family, such decision also made me lose alot: my privacy, my boyfriend, and my freedom.
My mum and I had to deal with our relatives who keep on telling us to go to events that they have to attend to, though most of the times I wanted to be somewhere else. Almost everyone has to know what I am up to. It is sad because all my perceptions towards some of them became distorted. Whom I thought to be the good one turns out to be pretty nasty and vice-versa.
The thought of having several snoops on my back doesn't really bother me that much but because I noticed that those snoops even get to backbite everyone around, i began to get sick of it. I thought that they talked to me so badly about everyone else so I wonder how they talk about me when I am not around. I hate the thought of how they make me and my mum feel so poor while they are on top, considerin themselves really rich. I started sulking in my room wishing to sleep the days away until the day I get the hell out of here.
Then maybe it just so happened that I began to regain my self confidence as I tried to get used to the behaviours of these people here. I started to form my own "formulas" as to how to avoid any conflicts with them and think of how to make myself happy.
Since my weight and my appearance is an issue to them and that I become a wallflower when I am with my other girl cousins who are sexy and younger, I thought about what really motivates me to lose weight. I learned that my mum wanted to do something about her health problems so I started doing exercises with my mum and our relatives' helpers. Now that we go out and jog every morning, we feel so good about ourselves. We are the poor ones in this place but we feel the best. We are able to get rid of the toxins in our bodies and eventually increase our sense of happiness. We feel that our bodies are becoming stronger and healthier. But I think the health benefits, which we primarily aimed, became more like just a bonus to me because I gained real friends among these helpers who really stick with us and show their most human sides, which i could barely find in the snoops that I have been talking about. I know that this is the kind of hapiness that they are missing.
My mum and I had to deal with our relatives who keep on telling us to go to events that they have to attend to, though most of the times I wanted to be somewhere else. Almost everyone has to know what I am up to. It is sad because all my perceptions towards some of them became distorted. Whom I thought to be the good one turns out to be pretty nasty and vice-versa.
The thought of having several snoops on my back doesn't really bother me that much but because I noticed that those snoops even get to backbite everyone around, i began to get sick of it. I thought that they talked to me so badly about everyone else so I wonder how they talk about me when I am not around. I hate the thought of how they make me and my mum feel so poor while they are on top, considerin themselves really rich. I started sulking in my room wishing to sleep the days away until the day I get the hell out of here.
Then maybe it just so happened that I began to regain my self confidence as I tried to get used to the behaviours of these people here. I started to form my own "formulas" as to how to avoid any conflicts with them and think of how to make myself happy.
Since my weight and my appearance is an issue to them and that I become a wallflower when I am with my other girl cousins who are sexy and younger, I thought about what really motivates me to lose weight. I learned that my mum wanted to do something about her health problems so I started doing exercises with my mum and our relatives' helpers. Now that we go out and jog every morning, we feel so good about ourselves. We are the poor ones in this place but we feel the best. We are able to get rid of the toxins in our bodies and eventually increase our sense of happiness. We feel that our bodies are becoming stronger and healthier. But I think the health benefits, which we primarily aimed, became more like just a bonus to me because I gained real friends among these helpers who really stick with us and show their most human sides, which i could barely find in the snoops that I have been talking about. I know that this is the kind of hapiness that they are missing.
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